reason number 425,685,730 why new york is better than new jersey...
after a wonderful weekend of getting ridiculously high and drunk (off of my mother's wine and my dad's weed), going to staten island and becoming slightly more content with the fact that i'll be moving back there for three months and getting psyched for my upcoming spring break, nothing could end it better than a concert where my favorite band (head automatica) was opening for another band that i'm pretty fond of (coheed and cambria), right? wrong.
i got to diane's house at around 5:30, the plan was for her parents to drive us to the convention center in asbury park, nj where the concert was being held and we were going to take a cab to the nearest path train and take the path train home.
the tickets claimed that doors opened at 6:00, and when we arrived at 6:15, we walked to the back of the not moving line...the doors had yet to open. after waiting in line for an hour to get checked that i wasn't planning any foul play at the evening's events by security, at 7:15 diane and i excidedly walked through the convention hall toward the stage, so that we could wait for head automatica to come on.
a band was already playing and i recognized the song, it couldn't be head automatica could it? how could the opening act go on before everyone's bag was checked? head automatica was just finishing the last 45 seconds of their last song of the night...bummer.
avenged sevenfold, a band that was headlining with coheed was up next, they were a band that kind of looks like a guns and roses cover band, that had way too many skulls and wings on stage with them...this kind of band really brings out the white trash of new jersey...the shirts came off (the fat, hairy men's shirts), the miller lite's were cracked open, and the parliment cigarettes were burning.
diane and i took this opportunity to try and figure out our best way to get home...note to self: never ask new jersey residents about public transportation, its a foreign concept to them...better yet, just never go to new jersey...
we asked pretty much every consession stand vendor, security bouncer and emt at the concert how we should get home...this is pretty much how every conversation went (give or take a little..)
us: you're a new jersey resident, right?
them: (proudly) yes!
us: we need to figure out how to get home, we're going to manhattan.
them: oh no problem just make a left on route 77, then go along interstate 97 until you hit route 17 and then make a right on exit 778 and then another left on route 67.
us: we aren't driving, we need to take public transportation...
them: (shocked, stumped confused) oh, umm...well...
us: we were thinking, we could take a cab to the nearest path train, do you know where the nearest path train is, and how much a cab there would run us?
them: the path? hmm, wow that's far, that's like a half hour away or something...a cab is going to be mighty expensive, probably about $40 for each of you, becuase the first 3/4 of a mile are at least $15...there's a train station somewhere near here, that drops you in penn station i think.
us: yea, we know, we saw it...it's about 5 blocks away, do you know how often it runs on a sunday night?
them: umm, maybe till like 9 or maybe until like midnight? you can call leon though.
us: who is leon?
them: the cab driver.
us: there is only one cab driver in all of asbury? he must be rich.
them: (not getting our joke) well there's one good hotel around here, i guess you could stay there if worse comes to worse, but i wouldn't want to get stuck here if i were you.
wonderful. diane calls her parents who are almost over the bridge, and they turn around and come to pick us up...
we go back into the concert hall to see if coheed is coming up soon, but avenged sevenfold is nowhere near finished. both me (a former smoker) and diane are getting sick from the clouds of cigarette smoke we're constantly getting lost in.
we buy popcorn and pepsi for $6 in hopes that will light things up a little bit...but now we just have popcorn kernels stuck in our teeth and have to pee...but refuse to take on the porter potties.
we find seats, and avenged sevenfold leaves the stage. diane recieves a phone call, her parents are here, they'll wait a little bit until the show is over. stage crew makes their way onstage and slowly starts to take down avenged sevenfold's stuff and put up coheed's...we wait, we text friends, we look at pictures, we cough, we wait, and wait, and wait for near an hour...
diane's parents call again, we tell them coheed hasn't even gone onstage yet, and decide that its rude to keep them waiting, so we leave, stinking of smoke and hating new jersey.
we stopped at a truck stop on the way home and i got a kids meal from burger king with an ice age 2 toy, and that made things all the better...
we traveled from manhattan to new jersey and paid $47.50 for each ticket to see 45 seconds of my favorite band, a band we didn't know, and the backdrop of a band we like...awesome.
<3
julieanna
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